


Fragile Things

by EverShadow



Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-12-04
Updated: 2012-12-04
Packaged: 2017-11-20 07:58:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,261
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/583068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EverShadow/pseuds/EverShadow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hope breaks things. She always has, and she always will.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fragile Things

Hope breaks things. Sometimes she means it, more often than not she doesn't. It started with a carton of eggs. Her mother was in the kitchen preparing dinner, and really, they were Hope's first steps. She stood up on two legs, reached and grabbed the carton. Eggs smashed onto the ground and her mother, rather than be elated, shouted in surprise and spent the next few minutes cleaning, rather than celebrating.

It was really just the beginning. Hope broke so many things after that, some tangible, some intangible. It was hard for her not to, growing up in a family such as hers. What she needed to learn - restraint, compassion, how to maintain a healthy relationship - she never saw in her household. At school, she was always the one to pick fights, to get into trouble, to be the source of many an injured heart. The students whispered daggers behind her back, called the ground she walked on the "Trail of Tears." She held her head high and ignored them. Soccer reigned her in a little, channelling her energy in a positive, less destructive way. And for a while, Hope stopped breaking things so much.

To say Abby and Hope's relationship began on the wrong foot was to outright lie about its severity.

"That's my locker." A young Abby Wambach looked up from her kneeling position. Her backpack hung from her outstretched hand, half in the locker, half out.

"I didn't know we had assigned lockers." Abby said, closing the door to make sure there wasn't a name on the front. When her inspection came up blank, she turned back to Hope. "Most of my stuff is already in this one."

"Look, I know it's our first day, so you don't know much about me. I have rituals. One of them is having the same locker as my jersey number." Abby's jaw clenched and she ran a frustrated hand through her close cut hair. Tension filled the room and Abby, not willing to put up a fight, not so soon into camp, gathered her stuff from the locker.

"Fine. Whatever." She shuffled to the opposite part of the room, muttering "f-ing diva." Hope sat down on the bench in front of the locker marked "1" and unpacked her things. _Whatever_ ,  Hope thought, _that girl won't last a practice._

She did. She also managed to net a ball during the scrimmage and Hope felt a pang of disgust at herself for not making the save. _She's all power, no skill._ Hope thought to herself with a click of her tongue and an angry huff. It was all excuses, really, she wasn't used to being on the pitch with so many talented girls, and it was Abby's misfortune that she should be singled out for her ability. Abby humbly celebrated her score, and it only served to fuel Hope’s anger. Did she think she was so good that scoring against her wasn’t a big deal?

“Good job, everyone, make sure to take care of your bodies, eat right, ice, rest.” April said, clapping her hands together. Hope slung her towel over her shoulder and stormed into the locker room, pushing past Abby while deliberately shoving her aside. As she sat down to open her locker, she heard Brandi whisper,  “Don’t mind her.” to Abby. Hope’s eyes lifted for a moment and caught Abby’s just as it disappeared around the corner. The tall forward wasn’t angry, rather she regarded Hope with a pitying stare, as if she knew Hope already. She slammed her locker, making all the other players jump, and she headed into the shower.

Dinner was as lonely as being a goalkeeper during a game. Hope sat in the corner, not expecting to be noticed by her other camp mates. She reasoned that she came to practice, to hone her skills, not make friends.

"Anyone sitting here?" Hope looked up at the person she least expected to join her table.

"No, go ahead." She was too surprised to find some excuse to turn Abby away. Abby sat down tray in hand opposite Hope and started eating right away. She tore at her sandwich, the turkey and cheese by the looks of it, without another word or glance at Hope. Hope’s own food turned stale in her mouth as she raced through all the possible reasons why she would even consider sitting with her after the way she’d acted.

“What did you think about practice?” Abby asked while chewing, choosing to ignore the contemptible atmosphere.

“It was ok.” And then, despite herself, she added. “Can’t believe you scored on me.” Abby snorted.

"You have a lot of confidence in your ability." She said looked up at Hope for the first time since she sat down. Her eyes were level, a little challenging and something like excitement and anticipation stirred in Hope's stomach when she held their gaze.

"I hold the record for saves at my school." Hope boasted. The short haired girl sat back in her chair and stretched casually, seemingly not bothered by Hope's ego. In turn, she relaxed in the face of Abby’s nonchalant manner towards her often grating and guarded personality.

“So, do you have anything else I should be aware of? Any other rituals?” The tall forward asked with a smirk that Hope found more endearing than mocking.

“Don’t score on me again.” Hope’s tone was serious and her eyes flashed at Abby with such intensity that anyone passing by might mistake it for an actual order. But a wordless connection passed between them that made it ok to joke, prod and tease. If Hope looked back one day, and had to pick a moment when she started liking Abby, she would return to this moment over and over again.

Hope wasn't sure when she started thinking of Abby as this indestructible wall. Perhaps the image of her beating down the field, taking tackles like they were mere grazes burned itself into Hope's mind. She's not sure when seeing Abby so physically unbreakable transitioned to her assumption that Abby as a whole the same. Perhaps it was because no matter what Hope said, no matter how harsh or unthoughtful her words were, Abby took it in stride, not betraying a single emotion if she felt any hurt or anger.

She does know exactly when hairline cracks start to appear. She knows it's because she breaks everything she touches.

It certainly did not take long, three days into camp, when girls started going back to each others rooms, disappearing for hours on end only to resurface, messy and giggling.

“Hey Wambach, if you could do anyone at camp, who would it be?” Abby blushed and focused her gaze on the ground. “We won’t tell. Promise.” Hope sipped her beer casually, interested in Wambach’s answer. She had her pinned for really feminine brunettes, so it was surprising when Abby shot her a red-faced glance and mumbled

"I dunno, probably Hope." The room erupted in groans and a lot of the women shouted in protest.

"You can't pick Hope!" Rampone yelled belligerently.

"That's totally cheating." Brandi chimed in.

"We all know you're sleeping together anyway." Lori grinned and waggled her eyebrows suggestively. Hope felt her face grow hot and she took a large swig of her beer. The action did not go unnoticed and the room erupted again, this time in cheers.

"Totally called it!" Rampone hooted and Abby tried her best to calm everyone down.

"We haven't slept together." Her voice drowned in the din, the clanging of bottles and screaming reaching an almost unbearable level. Hope eyed Abby’s face as it progressively darkened with worry, that people might actually think that they’d done the deed. She flinched when Abby kept insisting that they’d done nothing, that they didn’t even like each other that way. Her pride felt scratched. Didn’t she just say she would sleep with her given the chance? So why try so hard to defend it? Hope topped off her beer and grabbed another, her mood darkening with every protest that came out of Abby’s mouth.

By the time everyone decided to turn in, Hope was swaying in place. She made a move to get up, but Brandi gently nudged her back down.

“Rookies clean.” She ordered, motioning to the discarded bottles and beer cans all over the room. Hope shot her a dirty look which she ignored. Abby stayed on the couch where she was, picking up the cans nearest to her and stacking them on the table. Hope tried her best to grab at the empty containers, but her vision blurred and she wound up knocking a few over. Abby stood up and quickly righted them, throwing paper towels at the damp spots on the rug.

“It is going to smell like booze for the rest of the week.” She laughed. Hope tried to get up, but fell back onto her ass. Abby watched her try a few more times, most of them involving rocking back and forth until she picked up enough momentum to attempt an upward motion. Eventually, the forward took pity on her and extended a hand.

“Here.” She said. Hope grasped her outstretched hand and pulled hard. She lost her balance and knocked Abby right back onto the couch, knocking knees and heads as they collided in a heap. Hope stayed there a moment, listening to the thunder against Abby’s chest. She wondered if it was because of their proximity and didn’t wait for Abby to regain her senses. She leaned up and kissed her full on the mouth and when Abby returned the gesture in equal amounts of need and desire, they shifted into a more horizontal position on the couch.

Hope straddled Abby, placing her hand on either shoulder to pin her down and only straightened to take off her shirt. Abby's breath came in quick, disbelieving gasps. Her eyes, half lidded and filled with want, greedily devoured Hope's half naked, bra-clad body. She watched Hope's shoulder muscles ripple as she casually tossed her shirt onto the love seat next to them. Abby shifted under her, and Hope thought she was trying to get away. She fell back on hands and knees, pinning Abby again.

"Don't chicken out on me now, Wambach." She hissed, far too gone and turned on to let her go now.

"I wasn't..."Abby protested as Hope's hands slid under her shirt.

"Hey Abby, I..." A voice made both of them look up in panic. They might've just continued as there was no stopping Lori Lindsey from walking in. "Oh Jesus fuck!" Lori shouted, stumbling backward when she saw Hope and Abby in their position. She fell down and scrambled to get away. "Close the damn door! Damn it not on that couch, fuck, whatever!" She rambled disjointedly as she slammed the door shut behind her. Abby held her breath while Hope waited just a beat before returning her hands to Abby's stomach.

"Don't go in there!" She heard Lori shout when another voice, suspiciously like Mia, asked where Abby was.

"Hey, focus." Hope dug her nails lightly into Abby's ribs and Abby turned her attention back to the goalkeeper. Hope crushed her lips against hers and Abby’s large, rough hands found the back of her neck and head, pulling her closer to the point where it hurt a little and they could not breathe.The kiss did not last long because when Hope’s hand dipped between them and stroked the seam right over Abby’s core, the forward released her and gasped aloud.

Abby grabbed her shoulders with a menacing growl and attempted to flip them over into a more familiar position, one where she had control, one where she didn't have to expose her vulnerabilities. But Hope rocked her hips the opposite way and forced her back down.

"Let me." Her voice was full of promise, full of warmth and the wall Abby had put up in defense weakened. Hope tentatively loosened her grip on Abby's hips, pausing to make sure Abby would not try to flip them again. When Abby, panting with need, did not move, Hope kissed a trail from Abby's strong neck, over her shirt until she her chin touched the cold metal button on Abby's jeans. The forward sucked in a sharp breath when her fingers grazed her bare skin under the waistband and her eyes rolled up. Hope tugged her jeans down and Abby reluctantly lifted her hips to give her easier access but not without a whimper of protest.

"Hope, please." It sounded like a plea to continue but Hope did not hear the fear behind her voice. She did not hear the unspoken, " _don't hurt me. Don't break me_." Because Abby could handle rough, she could handle bruises, cuts, insults, and venom. She could not handle a soft voice, a gentle touch, and promises that would never be fulfilled. And when Hope's fingers found Abby under the fabric of her boxers, what protection and guard she had against her cracked wide open. When Hope curled her fingers and kissed Abby as she went up, and up, and finally came crashing down on the ground not a single barrier remained that could shield Abby. 

Hope thought she had found the one person who was unbreakable but as they lay on the couch, gulping air to fill their depleted, aching lungs, what Hope saw in the spent forward's eyes made her chest constrict with guilt. She had found Abby's weakness and she hated herself for feeling satisfied about doing so.


End file.
